Life's death
The abdomen contracts, hair lines up from toe to tip of the head and breathing becomes more irregular. The heart is suddenly beating so fast and kind of so slow at the same time. Death, it frightens us so much. The uncertainty of what happens to us when we are gone prevents us from thinking about it, from exploring and accepting the unpleasant and unfamiliar feelings and thoughts. I remember well when I first started thinking more intensively about death about three years ago. At that time, I thought I had discovered my being and satisfied my hunger. Turns out, it was the first of an infinite number of steps and everything that's now developing, day by day. Why does the thought of dying or letting someone die make us so afraid?
No, it's not human to be afraid of it. Leaving this earth is probably one of the most beautiful moments, filled with lots of light and love. I don't believe that death exists to frighten us or cause us pain. The emotional pain, the companion of death, even this one hurts more than just. Even this may be another chance to use it to discover something else behind all the life and death. With all the beautiful possibilities that life gives us and all the things that we as a human being can discover, develop and experience, why does it feel like a bad thing to go and discover a wider dimension of spiritual being? We cling so much to the world we experience through our physical body that we forget where life actually takes place. If we look for it in a world full of greed, power, money and lies, if we build our values on such systems, it makes sense to be afraid of death. For yes, death marks the end of all that man has accumulated and had in the course of his life. If we direct and focus on having in the outer world, it suddenly seems so clear again where the fear of death has its origin.
John, for example, said that he always wanted to do what his father did. Professionally as well as in everyday life. Because of his environment, he grew up believing that success and happiness can be found in a bank account, and family life is an essential part of being happy as a person. He relies on external things to fill his inner. When John thought he had finally found and deserved success and happiness, his father died. All his values, all his happiness suddenly seem to be slipping through his fingers like sand. Through grief and despair, he tries to overcome death, in which he wants even more to make life as worth living as possible. Not a day goes by when thoughts don't play hide and seek with him. He knows he has no control over life and death and now lives with the fear of not being able to reach and possess everything before his life comes to an end. The grief John processes into material things and the uncertainty of why a life ends, even though everything supposedly is going so well, creates so much fear and takes away his meaning. Because of the fear he carries inside, he forgets even more to discover and allow the values of his being to flourish.
Yes, it is possible and likely that John and his life have confused you even more and you feel that you have lost the thread. For me, this just shows once again that everyone is responsible for how they live life and at the same time stands for death. I believe that if you use your life to find your inner truth, and no, that's not what you're going to do for a living one day, how much you're going to earn, whether you actually have three healthy children or just one, then suddenly death turns out to be another big chapter in the miracle of Being, and the end suddenly seems to be just the beginning. The inner truth goes so much deeper and I wish every day that everyone would immediately understand what I mean by it, but even here every person is in different ways willing and open to experience and allow it.
Looking back and from the present point of view, I say with joy and great confidence that after life there is something waiting for us that simply cannot be understood by the human mind. Physical death marks the end of the body and of a human life, but at the same time opens the door to the next, infinite chapter, of which I am convinced. Because there is so much incomprehensible beauty in us that needs death in order to be able to grow further.
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